Secret Confessions of an Evolving Mom

January 10, 2022

As I skimmed through various Mom blogs with so many different names – Cool mom, Confused mom, Artsy mom, the Chef mom and so on and so forth I tried very hard to think of a name that would describe me best but soon enough, something dawned! Parenting is the most versatile job ever with no road map or directions, where your boundaries and levels of patience are tested each day and what worked today may not after two days! Nodding right? ? I couldn’t and wouldn’t put myself into any ‘one box’ , as I have found myself hopping from sometimes ‘Gentle Parenting’ to ‘ Strict Parenting’, from ‘Fun and Take-it-easy’  to ‘Time to pull up your socks and go crazy’, from being ‘Artsy Craftsy friendly mom’ to ‘I am the Boss it’s my way or the highway’, playing it cool  to a most competitive kind of mom’ (as I admit reluctantly and un-regrettably so, considering the unspoken yet very much existing pressures of being the ‘perfect’ mom always). Therefore, the tag ‘Evolving Mom’. Encourage your kiddos to maintain a journal To be honest this isn’t my first blog, since I have been writing since I was a little girl and when I hardly knew how to even construct meaningful sentences! A habit of journaling events, thoughts in a diary became a habit growing up, and was not only satisfying but also helped me organise a thousand thoughts bouncing around the walls of my ‘imaginative mind’. During this process, I also found a way to be true to myself as I was writing for ‘myself’ alone. Encourage your child to journal, and help them express their creativity, feelings, and dreams in a safe and constructive manner. The decision to write a blog on a public platform with those who would care to read was an easy next step that came as naturally to me as rainfall after clouds or as instinctively as a baby who has begun to stand and the next few steps that instinctively follow!Being Involved – Simple yet most Difficult Mostly, I strive to be an “Involved Mom” or a “Deeply connected” mom. As a parent, all one has to do in my humble opinion is – Be involved in what your kids are doing and know when to let them be, be it play or study, reading or writing, all one needs in order to be involved is showing genuine interest and asking them what are they making or thinking or watching and then really listening to them with full attention. That’s it! All the cues on how to be and how you can help and guide your child will be provided there and then. When they are in a flow, just let them be. It’s kind of like when teaching how to ride a bike, there shall be a moment when you shall let go of the handle. Raising Kids – Best Self Help course! Raising little human beings isn’t always easy, but also the most satisfying and fulfilling job ever! The journey of parenthood is a journey of self-improvement, when you see them acting as little mirrors reflecting all your behaviours, actions, mirroring your thoughts, be it conscious and yes, even sub-conscious ones…you are forced to immediately correct yourself. It’s like doing a course, where you can’t bunk classes, can’t take a day off, and you better score at least a “B”! Never underestimate your kid’s intelligence and their ‘super–sponge like’ power to soak up everything – your conscious and unconscious reactions, as they build their understanding of the world around them even before they learn to speak, based on your reactions to the environment around them, as they pick up on your body language like highly sensitive radars. Being self-aware is the key, as a parent we need to be aware of whether we are projecting our own fears, doubts, inpre-conceived notions, our own dreams, ambitions, and desires into them. Just Be and Let Be! Being a parent for me means “Being yourself”, making mistakes is human and no one is perfect, apologizing sincerely for an action, you regret would showcase to your child that it’s OK to make mistakes and teach them in turn to apologize, and mean it. Being your authentic self – be it fun, relaxed, energetic, crazy, happy, sad, upset, quiet, creative, and being absolutely comfortable with all your moods and emotions is another great  lesson you can give to your child as you show them how to handle happiness as well as disappointments, constructively in life. “Being a mother is learning about Strengths you didn’t know you had and dealing with Fears you never knew existed.” –   Linda Wooten- A Mom view log written by Sonali Sharma for Valuez. Available for free download on Android devices at https://bit.ly/2YVKD1C